Mental Health Awareness: How to Help Someone in Distress (Including Yourself)

If you learned you had diabetes, would you try to “just get over it” with willpower? If a friend broke her leg, would you tell her to stop feeling sorry for herself and get up and walk? Of course not. Diabetes is a medical condition that must be treated with medication, and walking on a broken leg can only make it worse.

But that’s how many people still see mental illness. It’s a character flaw you can fix by “getting over yourself,” or a problem you can solve with some determination and refusal to indulge in self-pity.

Although progress has been made in understanding mental illness, we still have a long way to go before we reach true understanding and acceptance. You can help remove some of the stigma by educating yourself and learning how to talk about mental illness – your own or a loved one’s struggle.

First, Know the Facts

Mental illness is a common occurrence, according to the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI). One in five U.S. adults experience some from of mental illness each year; one in 20 will suffer a serious disorder. Among youth ages 6-17, it strikes one in six. Among young people ages 10-14, suicide is the second leading cause of death.

Treatment is available and can bring relief, but reluctance to admit the problem keeps many from seeking critical help. The consequences of ignoring the problem can be dire: unnecessary disability, unemployment, substance abuse, homelessness, imprisonment, suicide. Even if the mentally ill person escapes those results, life with untreated depression, anxiety or another condition has little pleasure or fulfillment.

A variety of factors lead to mental illness. It’s often the result of a chemical imbalance in your brain that affects thinking, mood and behavior. Brain injuries have also been found to be connected to some mental conditions. According to WebMD, the disorders often run in families – but that doesn’t necessarily mean that if your parent suffered from depression, you will too.

Some mental illnesses may be triggered or made worse by psychological trauma that happens when you’re a child or teenager, such as severe emotional, physical or sexual abuse; a major loss early in life, such as the death of a parent; or neglect. Some disorders can be triggered by stressful events like death, divorce or job loss, and substance abuse can also aggravate mental disorders in some people.

Mental illness won’t automatically result from these factors, and feeling sad about losing a parent doesn’t mean you have depression. It’s important to know the signs of true mental illness so you can get the right help for yourself or a loved one.

10 Signs of a Possible Mental Health Disorder

The American Psychiatric Association cautions that experiencing a few of these symptoms doesn’t necessarily mean you have a mental illness, but you may need to be evaluated. If you are struggling with several for a prolonged period, or if any of them is causing serious problems in school or at work or in your general quality of life, you should see a physician or a mental health professional. If you have any concerns that you may need professional help, don’t hesitate to reach out.

Changes in sleep habits – either sleeping a lot more or a lot less
Changes in appetite – overeating or loss of interest in food
Mood changes or mood swings – sudden shifts between emotional outbursts and withdrawal, and overreacting to setbacks
Withdrawal from everyday life and loss of interest in activities you once enjoyed
Problems with memory, speech or thinking
Feeling disconnected from others
“Magical thinking” – exaggerated beliefs about your power to affect the world around you (positively or negatively)
Unreasonable fears about people or situations
Sudden odd, unusual behavior
Changes in school or work behavior — increased absenteeism, poor performance or problems getting along with others

Symptoms in Children

The signs of mental illness in children tend to be behavioral rather than internal, according to NAMI , who advises parents and other adults should watch children for these signals of a possible mental health disorder:

Changes in school performance
Excessive worry or anxiety
Unusual resistance to attending school or going to bed
Hyperactivity
Frequent nightmares
Frequent disobedience or aggression
Frequent temper tantrums

How to Talk About Your Mental Illness

Like any difficult subject, talking about mental illness requires sensitivity and careful consideration before you begin. But don’t be afraid to start the conversation. You’ll do more harm by ignoring the problem. And you may find others are happy you opened up and asked for their help.

Use the communication you’re most comfortable with. It doesn’t have to be face-to-face; a letter or an email lets you think about want you want to say before you say it.
Find the right time and place – a time when neither of you is busy or likely to be distracted; a quiet place where you can speak comfortably.
Plan what you want to say. You can jot down some notes or just review what you want to say in your head.
Be honest and open. Help the other person understand what you’re going through by telling them exactly what’s going on.
Tell them how they can help you. Maybe you just want them to listen and support you. Or maybe you need them to help you find treatment. Chances are, they’re eager to know what you need and what they can do.
Don’t expect too much from one conversation. The person you talk to may need some time to absorb what you’ve told them. They may not even accept what you’re saying at first. You may need to have another conversation, or a few more, before they really get it. Be patient – they’ll eventually come to understand.

Where to Turn for Help

If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health, there are many ways to find help:

Callor text 988 or visit org to reach the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline.
Contact the NAMI HelpLine to find out what services and supports are available in your community.
Get free, confidential help 24/7 from the National Helpline: 800-662-HELP (4357)

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Types of Mental Illness

These are some common forms of mental illness and how to recognize them, according to WebMD:

Anxiety disorders: Responding to situations or objects with fear and dread, often expressed with rapid heartbeat or sweating.
Mood disorders: Persistent feelings of sadness, exaggerated expressions of happiness; swinging from one mood to the other.
Psychotic disorders: Distorted awareness, most commonly hallucinations and delusions.
Eating disorders: Extreme attitudes about food, from binge eating to refusing to eat.
Impulse control and addiction disorders: Inability to resist behavior that can be harmful to themselves or others, such as alcohol or drug abuse or other risky behaviors.
Personality disorders: Extreme, inflexible personality traits that cause distress and can lead to problems in relationships with others.
Obsessive-compulsive disorder: Plagued by constant thoughts or fears that cause them to obsessively perform rituals that interfere with normal life.
Post-traumatic stress disorder: Lasting or frightening thoughts and memories of a traumatic event that keeps them from moving on from the harmful situation.